It’s already past 10 in the evening and you’re probably (still) sleeping by now. I just had my dinner with parents downstairs after me and my dad table tennis for almost an hour.

I was actually reading our previous text and LINE conversations and they made me smile. Often times I check those messages to remind myself how I am very thankful to have you around. It’s been almost 2 months we’ve been spending more time together (than ever) and I do appreciate how we still manage to talk with our personal lives despite of being busy with your capstone project and other academic requirements.

Your school days are almost over and I would like to congratulate you for all the effort you made despite of being negative or down sometimes. I do understand that sometimes you feel that you’re going to fail your capstone project because of some lapses. But please do remember what I promised you long time before – I will never leave you behind.

Tomorrow is the last day of revisions checking and I can’t wait how you and your group mates react as soon as you pass the course. Congratulations in advance. We deserve a break (and a celebration) because of this challenging term.

I will not lie to myself that I keep on missing you even though we mostly see each other every week. Call me clingy but I really want to see you everyday just to see you smiling. 

Allow me to recall some of the nights we’ve spent together:

Last Thursday was probably one of the best moments I had with you. It was the longest day that I spent with you, when you went home around 3 in the morning. I almost thought that day will never end, when the both of us refused to leave each other. Even though I almost felt as tired as you were, we we’re still together the whole night. To tell you the truth, I was almost in the verge of telling my students about my feelings towards you and how you are special to me in every single way. I was almost proud to tell them that you’re the person I’ve been waiting for the longest time and how I’m really excited to spend my life with you in the future. But then I realize that most people are still not open-minded to what’s happening, and I really think the best idea is to wait – and to be patient – because everything’s gonna be worth it.

Disclaimer: more clingy person ahead.

I miss you. I miss how you would tell me that you miss me, with that soft voice of yours. I miss how you tell jokes (like always) and share your life stories with me. I miss how you would hold my hand and start writing something to my fingers. I miss how you do your pogi sign when you caught me looking or staring at you. I miss how you would sometimes roll your eyes and get irritated when I try to mimic your small voice. I miss how you touch my heart and my soul.

Yes, we might meet tomorrow and spend more and more hours together in a day, but those memories we had (and will have) will always be a reason why I always miss you when you’re not around.

On the other hand, I really want to thank you that you still accept me as a person despite the fact that I’ve encountered traumas in life when I was just a kid. You have all the right to know those dark secrets from my past. I never had a doubt of trusting you to tell all those things.

The term is almost over and I’m stoked on what’s gonna happen for the next couple of weeks and months before you finally graduate. The big day is almost there and I hope you’ll be prepared. I hope we can spend more time together because I really want to know more about you. 

I really can’t take my eyes off you. Not unless when you suddenly look at me as if I was guilty staring at you.

Let’s have a good day tomorrow, shall we?

Good night in advance, beautiful person.

 

For the longest time,

A

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